**What Happened?**

How did I become obese? It started in the summer of 1997, I weighed about 130 pounds, and, out of the blue, I started gaining weight - fast - and in less than 9 months I was over 200 pounds. I hadn't changed my lifestyle or the way I was eating, so I was convinced I had a thyroid problem, but I was tested and my thyroid was fine. Finally, years later, after dealing w/ secondary infertility I was diagnosed with PCOS. PCOS can lead to infertility, obesity, and a bunch of other problems. So, okay, I finally knew what was going on, and I was put on medicine to help control it, and it did help a little, but I've still never been able to take the extra weight off. Why??....

Well, it's simple, I gave into the PCOS! I let it win. Sure, some of my weight problem is because of the PCOS (that's what my doctor tells me anyway), but alot of the extra weight, I believe, is because I just gave up. I had gained so much weight and it was so hard to lose, and I became very discouraged, so food (junk food) became my comfort.

So, to me, it really doesn't matter how I got here - the point is, I'm here. I'm fat, I'm obese, I'm a mess, and I need to move forward. Wait, I guess, I take that back - it does matter how I got here because I need to learn from my past mistakes, and that's what I'm trying to do. I'm told that because I have PCOS I will have to take medicine for the rest of my life (but I'm hoping the doctors are wrong!), and that it will be hard to lose the weight. I believe it will be hard, but I don't think it's impossible. I can't let PCOS or food lead my life anymore - I'm ready to take the control!