**Day 181**

I did it - I am below 220!!  Today's weight:

Yay!!!  I lost 2.5 pounds this week!  And I am out of the 220's FOREVER!

At the beginning of the month I was 222, and, at one point, I had a big gain and went up to 226, so I'm happy that I was able to get rid of that gain, and then lose another 3 pounds.  So, I can't complain about my 3 pound loss this month.  I'm just very happy to, FINALLY, be out of the 220's!!!

I've lost 29.5 pounds over the last 6 months (click on pic to enlarge):

I started this year at 248.5, and after 29.5 pounds lost I do some visual changes, but I can't wait to see more.  I want my double chin gone, I want tummy rolls to go away, I want to see some definition in my legs!  So, I can't wait to see what I look after I lose another 30 pounds.

I'll be posting my monthly progress pics in a bit - they'll be in "July 2011" at the right, under "Pictures & Pounds Lost".  Sadly, I don't see much of a change from last month. :(

**Day 180**

Total fail today on the exercise!  Actually, I failed on two things today.  I  had planned on exercising, and getting my whole house cleaned, but neither of those things happened.  My girls and I met up with our homeschool group for book club.  After book club, my girls were invited to their friend's house for a playdate.  So, with no kids for a few hours I had plenty of time to go home to get my exercising and cleaning done, but I decided to go spend some time with my sister and my nephews instead, and I had a very, nice afternoon with them.  Afterwards, I picked up the girls and then headed home to make dinner.  Right after dinner, I headed to Walmart, and didn't get home until about 8:30.  Finally, my thoughts turned to exercising, and the thought I had was - not going to happen.  Normally, I would fight off that thought, but tonight I didn't.  I looked at my hubby and girls cuddled up on the couch watching a movie, and thought - I just want to sit, and hang out with them.  So, that's what I did.

On a more positive note, my eating and water were right on today!

Tomorrow is my final weigh-in for June!  Let's hope my decision to not exercise today doesn't bite me in the ass!

**Day 179**

Exercise today:  30 Day Shred, Level 3. Yup, I moved up to Level 3!  I had to stick with the modified moves, but I got through it - yay!  I, also, did a treadmill workout: 5 min. warm-up walk, 1 mile run at 4.2 mph, which took me 14:15, then I did a 1 mile walk/run, which took me about 16 min., and then I finished up with a 5 min. cool-down walk.  So, I figure, I burned, at least, 400 calories during my workouts today.  Not bad, at all.

Tomorrow night I'm going to try another run outside, and, hopefully, it will go better than my Monday night run, but I'm not going to put too much pressure on myself.  I think, I kind of psych myself out a little bit on my outdoor runs, so I need to relax, and just do what I can.

I hope you all had a good day!

**Day 178**

My first 5K race is only 24 days away, and, to be honest, I'm very nervous about it!  I don't think I'm going to be able to run the whole thing without stopping, which I really wanted to be able to do, but I'm just not there yet.   I guess, I have to be okay with that.  I will run as much of it as I can, but when I need to walk I will.

My run tonight was....well, not much of a run.  I felt like crap, and I started walking after about 6 minutes.  I don't know what was going on....maybe I was just tired, maybe it's because I started my period today, maybe it was too hot, or maybe I'm just making excuses!  I just didn't have it in me to run tonight - physically or mentally. So, I ran for 6 minutes, and then I walked for 25 minutes - even the walking was a killer for me.  And by the time I got home my fingers, toes, and ankles were  so swollen.  Check out my fingers:

Trust me - they don't usually look like this!  Oh my gosh, they hurt so bad!  But I've been drinking water since I got back from my walk, and the swelling has gone down, a little.  I didn't get any other exercise in today - I should have, but I didn't.  I will do better tomorrow!

**Days 176 & 177**

We went to the cabin this weekend, and I decided to leave my computer at home, so that's why I didn't post yesterday.  It was kind of nice being computer-free for almost two, whole days!  I admit to being a little addicted to being on the computer, so it's good for me to get away from it sometimes.

So, only four more days left in June!  I'll do my final weigh-in for June on Thursday, and I'll be posting my progress pics, too.  I can't believe I'm already six months into my weight-loss journey!  I feel like I should be further along - I thought I would have lost more weight by now, but I'm not going to complain about my 27 pounds lost.  Yes, the weight is coming off slow, but slow and steady is okay.  I'll get all the weight off - I know I will!!

**Still Day 175**

Confession #5 - I once got stuck in our pool because I was too fat to get out!  (Tonight, I'm confessing about a few embarrassing things I've struggled through while being obese.)  Anyway, at our old house we had an above ground pool with a deck built up to it.  The ladder to get out of the pool was, loosely, attached to the deck.  One day, I decided to take a swim while my daughter was napping.  After enjoying my swim, I started to climb the ladder to get out, and the dang ladder fell right into the pool!!  And then I couldn't get the ladder attached to the deck again!! Below is a picture of the pool we had, but the ladder isn't in the picture because we took it out when we weren't using the pool.

Now, it might look like it would be easy to get out of this pool without a ladder, but for a 280 pound person....not so much.  I could not get out!  I tried pulling myself up and out with my arms, but I just couldn't do it.  I tried swinging one leg up on the deck to get out, but that didn't work.  Yup, I was stuck in the pool!!!  Lucky for me, and for my napping daughter in the house, my husband was due home any minute, so I never did panic, but it sure was a humiliating feeling to know I couldn't get out just because I was fat!  So, yea, my hubby got home to save me before our daughter woke up from her nap, but I never did take a swim again unless there was another adult in the house!

Another time, I was at my parent's house babysitting my twin nephews, and my daughters were there with me, too.  At the time, my parent's house was about 45 minutes from my home.  My parents and my sister weren't there - it was just me and the kids.  Well, my nephew, Luc, threw up all over me.  Of course, I didn't bring extra clothes w/ me, and I was 45 min. from my house, so running home wasn't an option.  I decided to borrow a t-shirt and sweatpants from my dad, while my clothes were in the wash - well, somehow I forgot that I outweighed my dad by about 70 pounds, so when I tried to squeeze myself into his XL shirt, and probably size M or L sweatpants it didn't work....not even close.  I don't know why I thought I would be able to fit into his clothes!  Again, it was a humiliating experience!  I had to hang out, with four little kids, wearing only my bra and underwear, until my clothes were finished washing and drying.  I never went over there to babysit again without taking an extra change of clothes!

What else?  Oh, when I was at my highest weight (in the 280's) my hubby would help me put on my socks and shoes because it was so hard for me to do myself.  I swear, it would feel like I was going to pass out when I tried to do it.  Of course, when the hubby wasn't home I would do it, but if he was there he did it to save me the agony!

Being obese has, definitely, been hard!  I mean, I used to even have trouble just reaching around to scratch an itch on my butt!!!  Thankfully, things are getting easier for me, but I'll never forget those times, which is a good thing because, hopefully, it will keep me from ever going back to being that big again!!

**Day 175**

When I weighed in two weeks I was 226, and on Monday I weighed in at 224, and today when I stepped on the scale this is the number I saw:

That's 4.5 pounds since my last "official" weigh-in two weeks ago.  Yes, I'm still in my 220's, but, at least, the number is going back down after that damn 4.5 gain I had at the very beginning of the month.  I'm going to try to be out of my 220's by July, and that's what I'm going to focus on - 219 by June 30th!  So, I'll need to lose 2.5 pounds in less than a week, which seems unrealistic, I guess, but I'm going to continue with the high protein meal plan, and see what happens.

Okay, I need to get off the computer, for now!  I'm taking my girls on an outing with our homeschool group.

Have a great day!